Morning Sun Saguaro

The sun rising in the Southeast this morning.

I like to imagine that life is like the rising sun, we always have a chance to change our lives and start over again, to follow new paths or to see things in a new way. The rising sun is the image I am keeping in my mind for the way I want to live my life, I want to see things as if seeing them for the first time, with wonder and joy, as if every sunrise is the first one I have experienced. The world is so beautiful and when I see things in this way, I feel good inside, as if I am the wonders I see in the world, as if I am a part of each colorful butterfly fluttering in the wind. I hope to always have butterflies in my soul and saguaros standing tall above my head in their wisdom.

I look up to the Saguaro.

This Saguaro is nearly 100 years old. I stand here thinking of all the things this plant has witnessed, how many sunrises and sunsets, how many lives born and ended within its vision and yet here it stands. It has tough skin and strong thorns that cause pain if one bumps into them. Standing here, I hear the song of the Saguaro as the wind gently blows past the ribs and spines. I touch the green flesh of the Saguaro and it feels like skin. I wish I had a friend that would stand by me like the Saguaro. These days the Saguaro and the butterflies have been my only friends. Oh, but it doesn't matter, I don't think I am fit to live in the human world. I think I'll spend days in the company of my wild friends. Maybe some day in the future someone will touch me the way I touch the skin of the Saguaro, with respect and love. I can feel the life of the Saguaro beneath its tough skin, as if it has a heart beating somewhere within. I have spent many hot summer hours in the shade of a Saguaro, resting from the heat of the day, and I have eaten their sweet fruit. I have bonded with these giant cactus. I love to hear each individual song as the wind plays through the sharp spines. Once I found three giant Saguaros growing together, the wind created a harmony of sound, each Saguaro played a different note. I sat down and listened. I think it is time to listen to the song of the Saguaro.


Written & photographed 10/5/2010

Pincushion Summer

So it rained two weeks ago three times, big short storms with lightning and pouring rain.  All the low spots in my garden filled with water and the washes were full.

These days of summer rains are when the gods walk in the desert lands.  If you have ever been out in the desert when a sudden storm comes along seemingly out of nowhere and you have nowhere to go except to endure the rain you will know exactly what I mean.  The gods walk in the desert when it rains.

The Pincushion cactus always flowers shortly after the rain in the summer, and sure enough, they did this time as well.



It has been so dry this past year that even many of the cactus and tough desert shrubs are dying, but not the Pincushions.  I admire their hardiness and their ability to flower at short notice. 




I think there is a message in this, the Pincushion Cactus is a wise teacher.

Enjoy the rains when they fall, enjoy the moments in our life when happiness and joy find us.  Endure through the drought, but don't let the long drought stop us from feeling the joy when those moments arrive.  This is how my life is in the last ten years, a never ending cycle of bad times and short periods of such grand joy that I feel like bursting with flowers, too.



I think I turned into a cactus and didn't realize it.

When I look closely at the Pincushion, I see myself as if in a mirror.



I'm waiting for the joy to come raining down, I know it will come again.  And when it does, you will recognize it by the ring of bright flowers sprouting from my head.

No wonder why I am so quick to smile when I am happy.

I'm a Pincushion Cactus.



Note:  Photos are of flowers from this land I call my garden, there are so many of them, probably hundreds of these little cactus sheltered under the shrubs and trees on this one little plot of land.

Closed My Eyes to See - a poem

At sunrise
closed my eyes to see
the world of sound
Cardinal calls out "Ether Ether"
blue water appears
ripples
expands
swirls
becomes a tree of many branches
ancient bark patterns moving
"Ether Ether"
again, the rippling waters
this time condensing into a face
I see eyes staring back at me
ancient face
eyes full of wisdom
"Ether Ether"
blue waters
a single eye approaches
engulfs
surrounds
darkness
I open my eyes


At the setting of the sun
I reach out
touch the leaves
smell earthy scents
hear quiet voices
plants speak quickly
words flashing by
so many expressions
noise buzzing
like children
crying out to be heard
speaking faster and faster
louder and louder
I get dizzy


At night
open eyes to hear
stars speak
whispers
secrets spoken slowly
long drawn out syllables
humming
sacred sound
"ohm"
universe sings
when I look at the stars

© 2011 Desert Dreamer

Blue Goddess - a poem and a drawing

A poem and a drawing I made:

Blue goddess of healing

men for plants

of a breath

I show

to goddess

dreams

hand cedar

the sacred bodies

and you remember

December in a Tucson Garden

Saguaro stands over the place I call my desert garden 

(I live on stolen land, it really isn't mine at all)

A Dragonfly landed on my arm to eat the fly it caught.

Baby Parry's Agave growing in the rocks.  This land is full of beautiful rocks.  Every time I dig I look forward to seeing the rocks uncovered and carefully replaced on the soil when I am finished.

Baby Fire Barrel with extra long thorns.

Pineleaf Milkweed in the late morning light and by it's side is a small Princess Agave with a flower stalk.

Pipevine with fresh new growth after the Pipevine Swallowtail caterpillars ate all the old leaves in October (eating shown below)